Remembering a dark day, sorting through a difficult decade

We've heard lots of “I remember where I was” stories as today's 9/11 anniversary approached. I've shared my own, plenty.

It was our second wedding anniversary, married on Sept. 11, 1999, and Katherine was five months pregnant with our first child. Instead of celebrating with a night on the town, as planned, we sat, shaken, in our living room, talking about how the once exciting prospect of bringing a child into this world had suddenly become frightening. The memories still feel fresh.

The impulse to recollect is strong. And one reason for that, I think, is that it's a heck of a lot easier than trying to sort out our feelings about the decade that's passed since that painful day.

I've been thinking about this for a while. I've read a lot of takes. And if you worry that you're too gosh-darn happy, read several recent assessments of the last decade. You'll be plunged into a deep tub of gray gloom.

And what can we say? What can we say about a decade that started with a hymn-singing, candle-holding, unified front in the face of something truly monstrous and ends now with people bitterly divided over even the smallest issues, ready to stick forks in each others' eyes over tax cuts, or even scheduling a speech.

Maybe we feel so frustrated and powerless because so much is incomplete or unfinished. We've got a long national to-do list, and we never seem to cross anything off.

Sure, bin Laden's dead, but there's no USS Missouri ceremony ending the war on terror. Our involvement in Iraq will not be wrapped up in a tidy “mission accomplished” banner. Fighting in Afghanistan continues with no certain end in sight.

The great recession won't recede. Unemployment won't budge. The deficit and debt stretch beyond our grasp into the future. The financial system collapsed, but virtually no one responsible was punished. Communities hit by disasters haven't recovered. So-called “wave” elections keep coming, but we never reach the dry land of real solutions.

So it's no small wonder that all these loose ends would drive us to the end of our rope. We, at least my generation and younger, don't do long and arduous very well.

But here's some good news. We have not given up, at this hour.

There was our president on Thursday still trying to fight through it. There were Republican hopefuls the night before, fighting it out over who could do better. Our troops are still working to clear thickets of violence and chaos that spawned Sept. 11 and plant some peace and stability. Millions work to keep the country running.

And that's really what we're all about. We've always been a work in progress. We're a nation defined by mile posts, not destinations. Trace the major threads of American history, and you'll find loose ends.

When we stop trying to get better, stop trying to climb to higher ground, that's when you can stick a fork in us. And for all that we've seen, and wished we hadn't seen, on and since Sept. 11, 2001, we have not yet seen that.