Mr. Stack Speaks

Impressed by the Sinclair smokestack's 6-1 City Council victory last week, I had to know how a towering pile of bricks could wield so much influence.

So I grabbed a megaphone and scored an exclusive interview.

Mr. Stack, are you stable?

“I think I am, Todd,” the smokestack said in a smoky but pleasant voice. “Granted, I'm more than 100 years old, but I don't feel a day over 1950. I think I can stand here a while longer, if needed.”

I'm not going to sugarcoat it. Public sentiment is against you. And yet, the council supports you. How did you do it?

“Well, honestly, it's pretty tough taking my case to the people. I mean, I'm anchored to a 41-foot plinth. It's not like I can go on the Bob Bruce Radio Experience. But I do speak to people who come out here to see me, including preservationists and some city leaders. They'd never admit it though. Talking to an inanimate object? That's crazy.”

Uh, well, are you surprised the council abandoned its original position of saving you with no public money and only if it did not delay demolition of the plant around you?

“Yes. As an enormous brick structure, I admire a solid position. I sense some serious shifting.”

You've been called an important symbol of Cedar Rapids' industrial roots. How do you feel about that?

“Actually, it's a little embarrassing. Look, I was a conduit for various industrial emissions. That's not exactly tough. The workers in the trenches, now they had it rough. You had to admire them. And although I appreciate the admiration of preservationists, and how they fret about my fate over sips of Pinot, I'd feel better if this charge to save me was led by someone who toiled here at my feet. They'd have more credibility.”

Interesting, Mr. Stack. There's been talk of dismantling you and using your bricks to build a monument or some other structure on this site. What do you think?

“I wouldn't have a big problem with that. I've been a smokestack for a long time. I've actually wondered what it would be like to be a bridge or a house or a giant patio. Change can be good.”

This must be a tough time. Your fate remains uncertain. How do you deal with it?

“Look, I've been standing here since 1909. I've seen this city grow and prosper and face enormous challenges. I've seen terrible storms and floods and fires. There's been joy and pain and everything in between. When you're as tall as I am, you don't miss much. I see it all.

“And I also know everything has to end. If that's my fate, so be it. And, seriously, I would make a very cool patio.”

n Comments: (319) 398-8452; todd.dorman@gazcomm.com