Gay or not, it doesn't matter

Was Marcellus Andrews gay?

I don't know; I don't care.

In fact, I don't think it's any of our business.

That doesn't mean it doesn't matter that the Waterloo man's assailants hurled anti-gay slurs at him as they beat him to death a couple weeks ago.

Either way, their choice of words points to a much broader problem.

Andrews died on Aug. 21, from head injuries he suffered in a fight on Conger Street in Waterloo.

He'd been hanging out at a friend's house when a car full of people pulled up and started taunting him, calling him “faggot” and “Mercedes.”

Andrews' family members say he wasn't gay. Police say the fight wasn't about his sexual orientation, that it was just a scuffle between rival groups.

And it sure wasn't the first time or the hundredth or probably even the millionth that a young Iowa man - straight or gay - was called “faggot” during a fight. It's a common playground taunt, much like the b-word, the p-word, the n-word - a whole alphabet's worth of epithets intended to question a boy's worth by lumping him in with a marginalized group.

That doesn't qualify as a hate crime under Iowa law - that law requires proof that the crime was motivated by bias.

Calling into question a young man's sexuality because he likes singing and designing clothes, or just because you're angry? That's just the water our children swim in.

They start using anti-gay slurs long before they think of each other “that way,” and if you ask them why, they'll say it has nothing to do with sex.

A “faggot” is weak, he's emotional, a baby. He's not gay, unless by “gay” you mean stupid - another playground term.

Some adults try to justify using the f-word on the same grounds - they're not talking about homosexuality, they just mean the guy is, you know, kind of queer.

But for kids, even adults, who are gay, it's one more reminder that they're not necessarily safe, let alone accepted, in their community.

For everyone, regardless of sexual orientation, it shows that the systematic dehumanizing of a class of people isn't just acceptable, it's the way to win a fight.

Marcellus Andrews is dead for no reason, his friends and family grieving - that has nothing to do with his sexual orientation.

But his assailants' choice of words has made this a good time to settle the issue: It's time to retire the f-word.

I don't care if you're a kid or an adult, or if you don't mean gay “that way.” I don't care if the target of your hateful words is gay or straight.

It doesn't matter.

Comments: (319) 339-3154; jennifer.hemmingsen@sourcemedia.net