CR Takes a Ribbing over its Trusting Nature

Don't look now, fair Cedar Rapidians, but urbane onlookers from the west are having a guffaw at our expense.

From Daniel P. Finney, paragraph manufacturer at The Register of Des Moines:

The last bloom of American innocence fell today in Cedar Rapids shortly after 8 a.m., when police issued the following warning to the public:

“The Cedar Rapids Police Department requests that citizens not leave the keys to their car in the car,” said Sgt. Cristy Hamblin, Cedar Rapids police spokeswoman. “When you exit your car, take the keys with you and lock the car.”

Apparently if you leave your keys in your unlocked car, a ne'er-do-well might just take it.

No, really.

I'll give you just a moment to let all the snark vapors clear.  

He's referring to a release from the CRPD, which we offered up snark-free.

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

July 21, 2011, 10:15 am

Be proactive in Theft of Motor Vehicles!

CEDAR RAPIDS, IA – July 21, 2011 – The Cedar Rapids Police Department wants to warn the public about the increase in theft of motor vehicles. Since June 1st, the PD has seen a 112.5% increase in theft of motor vehicle when compared with the previous 2 months of April and May.

Of the 34 vehicles reported stolen since June 1st, 64.7% of victims report leaving the keys in the vehicle, which they've also left unlocked. Of the vehicles stolen, 52.94% (18) have been recovered. The vehicles have been stolen from all quadrants of Cedar Rapids.

The types of reasons given by victims for leaving keys in the vehicle: 

1. “That way, I know where they are.”

2. “I don't have to worry about losing them.”

3. “My husband always loses them.”

4. “I was just too tired to carry them into the house.”

5. “I forgot.”

6. “I didn't think this happened in my neighborhood.”

7. “But my car was in the driveway.”

8. “I leave the keys in the ignition, so I don't drop them when I'm opening the garage door.”

9. “There was only a little bit of gas in it.”

10. “I didn't think anyone would want it.” 

The Cedar Rapids Police Department requests that citizens not leave the keys to their car in the car. When you exit your car, take the keys with you and lock the car. Do no leave anything of value in the car in plain view. If you must leave anything in the car, lock it in the trunk of the car, out of view of would be thieves.

The Register's take on this sensible warning drew a few reader comments:

DSMchick -- This is hilarious. I had no idea CR people were so clueless. I especially love the top 10 list at the end. Duh!

andyourproblemis -- This confirms my thoughts on people from the Cedar Rapids area.

Dafonz -- Chickens running around the backyards, cars unlocked....Cedar Rapids is weird.

Is not. Will no one defend CR?

davidamdahl -- Sorry folks, but I happen to believe we should be able to leave our keys in our vehicles. And those taking advantage of us should either be severely reeducated or permanently removed from society. My disdain is toward the perpetrator rather than the victim. But then, I'm probably dreaming and living in the past.

Yeah, it's the thieves, not the key-leavers who deserve your scorn.

Still, the excuses are lame. And it is non-smart to leave keys and valuables in your car. And we do have some chickens.

So laugh away, Des Moines. Then try to 

figure out what the name of you city actually means.