Dealing With The DMV

Oh what fun it is to get a new driver's license. I had to do it last year and don't have to renew for another four years. Whew.

But, last March the woman camera operator at the driver's license station for the Iowa Department of Transportation had me take off my glasses before she snapped my picture. I remember objecting because I always wear my glasses -- at least I have since 1992 when damage to my left eye prevented me from wearing contact lenses as I had since 1969. But the woman ignored my protest, saying it was policy to have everyone take off their glasses. (See today's Ramblin' column in The Gazette.)

Then she told me not to smile.

What? Don't we usually look sober enough in those mug shots without having to make them look bad on purpose?

Now, from recent news stories, I understand that those two actions are part of security, to make sure we're all not terrorists. It has something to do with the way recognition software compares the driver's license photo with other photos. I take it those other photos would be police mug shots where, obviously, most people would not be smiling.

OK. I can live with that. How many folks are going to see my driver's license photo anyway and how many of those people are really going to pay attention to whether I'm smiling or not?

But then, what chapped my hide, is the new policy that driver's licenses in Iowa will now be mailed to us. Not handed to us as we complete the application (new license or renewal) process, but mailed to us within 30 days. Again, this is presumably so they can check to make sure we didn't use any fake documents to get the license in the first place.

How inconvenient is this? Because the paper license they'll issue can't be used for identification, that means we don't have anything to prove who we say we are for up to 30 days.

Granted, things are different now. When this happened to me in California in 1987, I was new to the state and made a lot of purchases with a check. Without proper ID, I couldn't do that. Without proper ID it was even difficult to go to my own bank to cash a check for cash to use instead.

Now we pay for everything with debit cards or credit cards or cash (for small purchases). I never write a check  in public anymore -- I only use them to pay bills that I don't want automatically taken out of an account.

Still, when the time comes to renew my driver's license, I don't want to go 30 days without identification. I'd feel like a man without a face, or at least my mug shot in my pocket. It would be just my luck that I'd need to prove myself during that 30 days. Or that my license would get lost in the mail.

Then what happens? I don't have the old license to prove who I am. I'd be using the same documents without photos that I used a long time ago. And, if approved, I'd have to wait another 30 days before having proper ID.

I suppose if this makes our roads safer, it's good. But I remember once when an older woman in front of me got a license even though she couldn't see the blinking lights for the peripheral vision test.

Also, I know there are  lots of people out there texting or talking on cell phones while driving or even driving so crazily I'd swear they bought their license at Sears. It's these people I fear, the terrorists of the road.