Sexual relationships between students and teachers

Prosecutors have charged twenty-six Iowa teachers for having sexual relationships with students over the last four years. Last year, those charges led the State Board of Educational Examiners to revoke or suspend eleven teachers' licenses. Five additional teachers have already faced similar consequences this year.

Jane lost her father at a young age and started using drugs and alcohol by the age of 13. She asked her favorite teacher for help.

“He seemed approachable. We talked and he was going to coach me or help me to not continue to drink and use drugs,” she said.

One night, she got drunk and reached out to him.

“I called him for help and he came to where I was and got me out of the situation. Then, he proceeded to make out with me,” Jane said.

The relationship would only grow more intimate after that evening about thirty years ago.

“He romanced me with songs and gifts,” she said, “To have that kind of attention from a grown man feels very flattering. I thought I was very special.”

Bob was a well-liked teacher having marriage problems not too long ago. He ended up in a whole different kind of trouble.

“I had a lot of fear about being alone. I allowed myself to erroneously think that perhaps there was a possibility of having a relationship with someone who was a student at the school,” Bob said.

Temptation turned into a relationship. He got caught. His career ended. He became a sex offender.

“I allowed myself to think this is a pretty mature individual. She seems interested in me. It was flattering to me. I allowed myself to go a direction I shouldn't have allowed myself to go,” Bob said.

Even though Bob and Jane have never met, they share a bond built on broken trust.

“I knew it was wrong, but I was so dazzled by the feelings of being cared for and romanced by this person. It overshadowed everything else,” Jane said.

Bob shared a similar sentiment. “I did not set out to hurt anyone. I allowed myself to think this was okay. It wasn't,” he said.

Over the past year, prosecutors have charged more than a half-dozen Iowa teachers for allegedly making the same mistake Bob did.

“Quite often they target children that have behavioral problems in school, disruptive behavior, already have some credibility issues and whether they'd be believed or not,” Sex Offender Program Manager Randy Cole said.

Yet, experts say teacher and student relationships have always lurked in the classroom.

“I don't believe it's happening more. I think it's getting reported more,” Cole said, “People now understand how to report, where to report and they understand who to report to.”

Decades ago, Jane never considered reporting her teacher.

“Realistically, I think I would have been far too afraid to do that. Number one, I would have felt guilty. Second, I wouldn't have wanted him to get into trouble,” she said.

Back then, the fear of speaking out against a well-liked teacher felt paralyzing. Jane thinks it would feel liberating today.

“Once the secret's gone, a lot of the power in that relationship goes away because the secret is out,” she said.

Bob is now on the sex offender registry. It's against the law for his children to bring friends into his house. Although family members remained by his side, his son's reaction hurt more than any other punishment.

“He said, ‘You know, Dad, I used to look up to you and respect you as a role model. But, now, I don't know.' It's a very painful thing,” Bob said.

Bob used to tell people he had no regrets. “I'll never say that again,” he said.

Jane regretted getting involved with her teacher when he started dating another seventh grader the following year.

“Love, intimacy and sex – those are three different things. For someone who's been abused, all of that gets mixed together,” she said.

Two lives woven together by threads of lies. Two families wounded forever. Two warnings for any teachers and students who might be in a similar situation.

“Don't ever allow yourself to think, even for a moment, there might be some sort of circumstance or some sort of rationale that makes it okay to cross the line,” Bob said, “I can't go back and change what I did. If I could, I would turn back the hands of time.”

Jane said, “You're probably not the first person this teacher sought out and you probably won't be the last.”

Although they've chosen to hide their identity, their voices speak to a problem all too often silenced by fears of embarrassment. Both experiences taught Jane and Bob lessons they never thought they'd learn in school.

Bob cannot legally speak to his victim, but says he would like to apologize. Jane confronted her abuser years later and said the experience brought her some closure.

Right now, there is no formal or standardized training for teachers about avoiding getting involved with students. But, the Iowa State Education Association is developing an ethics class that will include lessons about avoiding these kinds of relationships.

By Mark Geary, KCRG-TV