Iowa is becoming a regional hot spot for gay marriage

Iowa is becoming the regional hot spot for gay marriage.

Eleven couples are bused in to Iowa City from St. Louis, Missouri to tie the knot, knowing full well once they crossed the borders back into the Show Me State Friday night, it will be as if what happened earlier that day – at least in the eyes of the state government – did not happen.

For Maria Whitter, 42,  and her partner of 16 years Lisa Hardin, 48, both of St. Louis, they just want to focus on the fact their dream of legally marrying is becoming a reality.

“It's a great day,” said Whitter.

Whitter believes that walking down the aisle – as she did clad in a long, purple dress holding a bright bouquet of spring flowers Friday – is about walking towards the one you love, regardless of their gender.

“When it all breaks down, it's about love,” explained Whitter.  “It's about recognizing that two people love and cherish each other.”

Still, Whitter knows that many she and her new spouse encounter in coming years might not be so welcoming of their new union.

“The best way to break down the stigma is person to person,” said Whitter.  “Recognizing that we shop, we go to the movies, we make dinner, that really is what our life is about.  It's just like everybody else's.”

Eg Reggi, who married his long-time companion Scott Emanuel one year ago, has found some Missourians to recognize their marriage, though the government does not.

“Individual businesses and corporations do recognize our marriage,” explained Reggi.

Reggi said he has received insurance discounts, medical record updates, and banking accommodations similar to those offered to heterosexual couples receive.

“I didn't get married for those things, but it's sure nice to know that there is a respect and people treat us like a unit,” said Reggi.

Marriage equality activists are hoping that the social reform that happened in Iowa nearly a year ago with the state Supreme Court's decision in Varnum v. Bailey that legalized gay marriage will soon spread throughout the Midwest, and beyond.

But, opponents to same sex marriage in Iowa are pushing for a constitutional amendment that would define marriage between a man and a woman.

Efforts for more states to legalize gay marriage could be expedited or delayed based on a ripple effect Reggi believes will ensue following the upcoming ruling by federal district court judge Vaugh R. Walker regarding the validity of California's proposition 8 gay marriage ban.  That decision is expected June 16.