Coping with sports anxiety

The worst part for me over the 10 years I participated in competitive sports was the anxiety I felt before each race.

I spent a lot of time in the bathroom.

I still don't understand how I could love something so much while at the same time wondering why I put myself through this every time I stepped on the starting block.

Now watching my grandson from the stands as he steps up to the batting box, I understand what he's feeling. He rarely has difficulty hitting the ball in practice, but during a game, I see him struggle, which partially is attributed to his nerves. (And some to a 9-year-old's pitching ability to get the ball over the plate.)

My grandson takes sports very seriously at his young age. He wants to have fun, but he also wants to win badly. And when he can't contribute to that outcome, he is very disappointed.

Do you see your young athlete struggle with anxiety that can affect his or her performance?

The first thing to help your child cope with this is to remember butterflies are a good thing. It's normal. If there are no butterflies, I believe, the child doesn't care enough to play the game. He or she is just going through the motions. If there are butterflies, the athlete just needs to learn how to respond to the pressure and nervous feelings.

Kevin Hickey, in CoachUp Nation, writes how people can 'come through in the clutch.' Even 9-year-olds can use these tips.

l Have a plan. 'If you fail to prepare, then prepare to fail.' Hickey advises to 'anticipate your course of action during your at bats ... and make them as simple as possible. If you're slated to get 3-4 at bats in the big game, think about cutting the plate in half, and owning your half.'

l Visualize success. 'The night before, the day of, or on the deck circles, see yourself succeeding.'

l Embrace the butterflies. 'The feeling we get when we are nervous and anticipating a big game is a natural survival instinct ... Scientifically, our senses and reactions are geared to fire at their peak levels when this feeling is present.'

Keith Wilson, writing for momsTeam, noted performance anxiety can impede sports development and 'children in general are under more pressure today than ever to perform to adults' expectations.

'Sometimes we will tell our young player to relax while they are out there. But if we do not teach them to 'relax under pressure,' then telling them to relax only increases the pressure and anxiety they feel.'

Wilson lists the following relaxation skills you can teach your child, the easiest being breathing.

'When we help players learn how to exhale effectively, their enjoyment of the game can improve,' he wrote.

l Teach them to experience the relaxation response that comes with intentional exhaling. Do this in the comfort of your home. Practice every day so it becomes natural.

l Help the player to recognize when to do a 'Performance Exhale' in the game, like when settling into the batter's box, or, as a pitcher, just before the wind up, or, as a field player, when the pitcher starts their windup.

Wilson wrote the player will start to build and experience confidence. They will be more focused, probably will improve their skill level and, most importantly, 'will enjoy the game more.'

Additional tips for coping with pressure from BelievePerform include designing a training program that mimics performance conditions, approaching a situation with a more 'task-oriented' perspective (staying in the present rather than focusing solely on the outcome) and remembering the outcome is not the most important thing in your life (relax and enjoy the event).

Ashley Tryban, founder of Grounded Pada Health, also writes in CoachUp Nation that the old mantra 'I think I can, I think I can' works for humans as it did for 'The Little Engine That Could.'

'Developing a positive mantra or phrase to use during practice that will be comforting before and during races has also proven effective. Think of a present 'I am' statement such as 'I am strong.' The mental power of a positive mantra will only aid in driving the body toward a strong performance.'

l Let us know what you think. Send comments to njustis@cfu.net

Editor's note: Nancy Justis is a former competitive swimmer and college sports information director. She is a partner with Justis Creative Communications.