Civil union more fitting definition

By Dr. Mark J. Tyler

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In my lifetime, I would hope that we, as citizens of this great nation, could somehow disallow or mute the extreme views and/or positions on so many of our societal flashpoints. I also confess that my personal perceptions and emotions on many topics have changed as I have entered senior citizen status.

I also realize that the vocal outliers help to define many issues, but it appears they do not seek a common ground or a consensus that serves the majority and allows us to move forward. My maturation has allowed me to view our gay/lesbian/bisexual/transgender (GLBT) population in a different context than what I professed when starting out in my career.

During my years in private practice, I cared for several gay patients and probably others who did not confide in me. The vast majority wanted to be accepted and appreciated for who they were. In my early years, many led a solitary life as they feared the societal stigma placed against them for their orientation. We now see they are more open in their orientation even though prejudices still exist.

I tried to support them in their decisions and to not be judgmental. It was a lifestyle to be recognized, embraced and to be comfortable with during their lifetime. Almost without exception, they were wonderful, intelligent, resourceful, hardworking and loving people.

I believe that ignorance engenders mistrust and hate and delays reality and acceptance. I support without reservation the gay community's right to be treated equally as our Constitution guarantees that right. They are protected by the same laws that protect me and my marriage. My faith also asks that I love my fellow man and not judge him/her.

The one factor I still struggle with is the question of same-sex marriage. Not the act per se but the title bestowed. My dictionary defines marriage as a “relationship between husband and wife ... a state/relation between a man and a woman.” The marriage also presages the possibility of children. At this time that requires opposite genders. however, in the future, who knows?

What I would suggest, with love, is that the GLBT population endorse the single concept of civil unions. This would legitimize their association/union under law. Because by definition and history, their liaison is not a marriage. Yes, it would be separate, but it would be equal.

I believe most of our state legislators would be open to this interpretation. Let Iowa again lead in this most important societal question.

Dr. Mark J. Tyler has practiced medicine in Cedar Rapids since 1971, first in family practice and more recently in urgent care. He also is medical director of the Cedar Rapids Physician Hospital Organization. Comments: mtyler@crpho.com