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Dangerous Leader: Taking stock at age 50
Here are ways to honestly assess your life
By Jennifer Smith, - Dangerous Leader columnist
Nov. 24, 2024 5:00 am
The Gazette offers audio versions of articles using Instaread. Some words may be mispronounced.
Last week, I turned 50. Entering a new decade tends to inspire a deeper level of reflection. The day before my birthday, I spent some time with the experiences of my 40s.
What I saw in that journey through time was a pretty big decade.
Job changes, relationship shifts, raising a child to a teen to a young man, getting my doctoral degree, buying two homes, selling a business, publishing a book. All of it punctuated with the loss of my husband. That one left me feeling like I was wandering aimlessly in the woods. A prison and freedom all in one.
I encourage this kind of honest assessment of your life periodically.
Take stock of your achievements, lessons learned, where you've been lazy and where you've pushed too hard.
We do this as leaders in business through financial statements and strategic planning. In our personal lives, we can use whatever tools we please.
A few I'd recommend:
- Vision board. Vision boards are fabulous when you are someone who wants to see it. Create a where I have been, where I am, what I am creating version.
- A personal SWOT. I use this one with the special operations veterans I coach. Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities and Threats. Create four squares on a piece of paper and jot notes in each square. Create an action plan to leverage your strengths and opportunities while improving weaknesses and/or mitigating threats.
- Align your priorities. List the five most important values you hold. List what you are doing that align to each of those. List anything you are doing that is not aligned to those separately. Challenge yourself as to why you are doing those things not aligned.
I did a version of that last one the day after my birthday. I spent my birthday reading, watching some bad TV, relaxing by the fire, followed by dinner with my parents and son. The next day I got to work.
Taking stock
I found as I move into my 50s, the sense of aimless wandering is revealing its purpose. The energies I've embraced for so long are taking on new meaning.
Here is what I came up with as truths to guide me into this new decade.
1. No limits. No limits to the boundaries I can place to protect me and those I love most.
2. Never settle. Never settle for the first impression. Never settle for the first wave of excitement. Never settle for surface level. Never settle for good enough.
3. Live dangerously. Live dangerously true to self. Saying yes to my intuition. Trusting myself. Being true to my energies. Saying no to the misaligned and not quite right.
4. Be you. Be me. Take my own advice. Everyone else is taken. Be exactly who I am. Writer, healer, adventurer, non-conformist, defier of expectations, raising this kid through this time of transition, awkward, extroverted introvert, foulmouthed, dirty minded dog lover who has lived a life so far that sometimes seems unbelievable. And I have a cat, which still confounds me.
These exercises can be used anytime. And just as we take stock and review, plan and recast our intentions in business, so should we as leaders and humans. Intentionality and connection to self-awareness are key attributes of the Dangerous Leader.
Live Dangerously, Be You.
Jennifer Smith is a Cedar Rapids-based personal and executive coach, host of The Dangerous Leader Podcast, and unapologetic optimist. Comments: jennifer@dangerousleader.com; @drjennsmith
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