Dangerous Leader: Let’s talk about burnout

Earlier this year Forbes.com shared a new survey from Slack that reported burnout is on the rise globally, most significantly in the U.S., where 43 percent of middle managers reported burnout — more than any other worker group.

I have gotten to extreme burnout a few times in my life. I am not proud of this. It never has been, and never will be, courageous or heroic to burn yourself out in the course of routine working conditions.

Extreme conditions call for extreme action, yes. But in your day-to-day life, if it is taking you to burnout — see that for what it is. It is not a badge of honor.

And leaders, if you are expecting heroic efforts from your employees to create spreadsheets or run financials or create PowerPoints, knock it off. The size of our expectations and reality of humanity need to be reconsidered, and reconsidered again, if we care as much about people as our company slogans say we do.

Saying one thing, and behaving another way contributes to burnout.

For example, a colleague shared a response they received from a leader they had approached with some concerns about their department’s exit survey feedback. The leader’s response to the stated concern was, “If someone is saying they are burned out and aren’t working more than 40 hours a week, I don’t want to hear it.”

The leader was losing people due to their unrealistic expectations and was in denial about it. Even more infuriating was their complete disengagement from the idea that life outside work even existed.

Burnout defined

Burnout has been added to the International Classification of Diseases by the World Health Organization as an occupational phenomenon. It is characterized by three dimensions: feelings of energy depletion or exhaustion; increased mental distance from one’s job or feelings of negativism or cynicism related to one's job; and reduced professional efficacy.

In this definition, the focus is on what is happening in the workplace. However, most of us know personal and professional lives can impact one another.

My first burnout was while deployed with the U.S. Army, and I was in charge of establishing theater level logistics for the fledgling war in Afghanistan in 2001-02. I was charged with making sure every type of need our warriors had was met.

The chance that someone would die increased if I didn’t do my job. I pushed myself to extremes to make sure I did everything I could to guard against that. At the same time, I was in the middle of a contentious divorce.

I burned out another time trying to make ends meet.

I had decided to go into business for myself, then burned the temporary safety net I had by getting divorced. There were days I would work 14 to 16 hours and still be worried about paying rent for home and my business as well as being able to feed my kid. It was a small thing that tipped me into burnout mode, and it took big efforts to pull out.

The most recent was when my husband died a few months ago. This one was different. His death burned down the walls I had raised to keep me shielded from parts of my life. I sagged under the weight of not only his absence, but the things that were not feeding my soul.

When I collapsed, it was brief. I was able to transition this one from catastrophe to a new outlook on life — in part thanks to the support of the people I work with and for. My workplace continues to offer understanding, and I feel safe to ask for what I need.

We don’t all have the luxury of saying no when we want to because others depend on us for their survival. We can’t all take the break when we need to because others depend on us for their survival.

We don’t all own multiple homes and cars and take trips all over the world when stress begins to rub against our arm inappropriately. We don’t all have the support systems we need. We aren’t all here for it all the time.

3 things to consider

Three considerations for leaders as you guard against burnout for yourself, and those you lead:

1. Be realistic. Use tools like an Eisenhower Matrix to help categorize the urgency and importance of tasks.

2. Recognize there is no requirement to live to work. In fact, most of us probably prefer to work to live.

3. You don’t know people’s stories outside of what you are allowed to see. Try curiosity before indicting people’s efforts.

It is an honor to lead. It is a privilege to have others look to us for guidance. Do you treat it that way? Or do you view those you lead as billable hours, producers or service providers that simply bring in more cash for your multibillion dollar business?

As leaders, we can be part of the problem, or we can support the solutions. What would you prefer?

Lead Dangerously. Be You.

Jennifer Smith is a Cedar Rapids-based personal and executive coach, host of The Dangerous Leader Podcast, and unapologetic optimist; jennifer@dangerousleader.com; @drjennsmith