Lonely, isolated life concealed years of sexual abuse, stealing Eastern Iowa woman’s childhood

Editor’s note: Typically, The Gazette does not disclose the names of sexual abuse victims, but Ellie Gintert asked to have her story told, with her name, in hopes of providing courage to other survivors of sexual abuse.

Ellie Gintert didn’t know what normal life was like. While growing up, she couldn’t check out a book from a library, hang out with friends or ride a bike.

Elie, now 20, was raised in what she called an “ultrareligious and secluded” environment, where her father was dominant and had “total” control over his children and wife.

In their home, Ellie and her six siblings were required to be obedient and accept whatever their father said without question, she said. After her father became religious and her parents started going to church, her mom had to quit her job and stay home to care for and homeschool them.

The four girls and three boys were treated differently, Ellie, formerly of Hiawatha, said. Their father gave the boys more freedom and respect.

“We (females) weren’t allowed to cut our hair, wear certain clothes that might tempt a man or drive a car,” Ellie said. “I had very little self-expression. I couldn’t dye my hair, wear makeup or wear what I wanted.”

It was a “lonely environment,” Ellie said. She had a few friends when her family went to a church in Marion, but something happened, and they stopped going before she turned 13. The family then had church at home. The siblings relied on each other for companionship because they couldn’t go outside the home.

The isolation also hid a darker secret, which was revealed March 18, 2023, when Ellie’s father Eric Edward Gintert, 54, of Hiawatha, was arrested and charged with nine offenses of sexual abuse and assault of Ellie.

That also was the moment Ellie lost her family. The family shunned her because she reported the abuse, which her mother and siblings denied to police. Ellie was cast as the “villain” and her father as the victim.

The Iowa Department of Health and Human Services, after Ellie reported to police, required Eric Gintert move out of the home. Ellie fled her home after turning 18 because her family had made her life miserable because she spoke to police. She didn’t have anything when she left but she had someone to help her — or so she thought. Later, she said, she had traded one “bad” man for another.

Years of abuse

Ellie said her father started molesting her when she was 12 or 13 and going through puberty, which was documented in the March 18, 2023 Hiawatha Police reports. At the time, she had become more outspoken and started rebelling and standing up to him. She believed her dad had to find a way to control her because he couldn’t “break her spirit” like he had her mother’s.

“This was a super lonely time for me,” Ellie said. “I didn’t have any friends, and the few I had were gone since leaving the church.”

Ellie said the molestation for a period of time would happen daily or weekly. At some point, it stopped for a while but then started again, leading up to the incident in 2023 when she reported the abuse to an Iowa Department of Health and Human Services caseworker, and later a forensic interviewer at the UnityPoint-St. Luke’s Child Protection Center and police.

She learned, while in therapy, that she may have blocked out some of the abuse. Ellie said she couldn’t recall every incident and provide exact dates, so her father was only charged with offenses that she could describe and link to a specific time period.

Her father later made an Alford plea to five charges. In an Alford plea, a defendant doesn’t admit guilt but admits the prosecution has sufficient evidence to prove its case.

Eric Gintert denied to police the touching was sexual. He said it was a form of discipline. He declined to comment for this story.

Violence in the home

Long before the sexual incidents started, her father always had “fits of rage and would turn into a different person,” Ellie said. He would push or shove her and slap her across the face when she upset him.

She recalled one time in July 2022 when her father held her by the throat, strangling her, as he held her against a wall, which was also described in a police report. That happened, she said, when she attempted to defend her mother. Other times he would get mad over minor things such as not cleaning enough or talking out of turn.

Her mother would sometimes step in to protect her children if she could, but Ellie said her mother didn’t protect her when the abuse turned sexual. Her mother didn’t initially know about it but did nothing after she became aware of the abuse, Ellie said.

Punished for seeking friends

Right before the molestation started, Ellie, who was about 13, recalled being depressed, lonely and experiencing all kinds of emotions going into puberty and not understanding her body changes.

She needed to talk to someone her age, so she went online and started chatting. In hindsight, she realizes that wasn’t safe or smart, but she didn’t know that then.

She had limited access to the internet, which was monitored by her parents, for homeschooling and later the “family business,” which her dad forced the older siblings to spend most of their day working online creating informational blogs that generated money for the family from ads.

But Ellie found a way to access social media sites to meet people.

However, her mom caught her and blocked some of the sites. Ellie begged her not to tell her father, saying she preferred to tell him.

Two weeks later in March 2018, she followed her dad downstairs to talk to him about her social media use. He immediately became upset and started asking her if she did it for “sexual gratification.” She said no, that she didn’t understand what he was saying.

She knew little about sex, which, she said, had always been a “taboo subject” in their household.

Her father then started grabbing and fondling her, and she didn’t understand it. She didn’t like it, but at the same time, she loved her father and didn’t think he would hurt her.

When he stopped, he started “sobbing and saying he was a molester and monster.” She didn’t understand what that meant. Her dad said, “How can you forgive me. How can God forgive me.” She cried and forgave him, and they prayed together.

But he didn’t stop. He would find ways to get her alone.

‘No salvation’

In the beginning, she said, her father would beg for forgiveness after fondling her, and it would stop for a while but then start again. At some point, all remorse was gone. He told her she couldn’t tell anybody because if law enforcement found out, she would lose her father.

“He was a master manipulator,” Ellie said.

Ellie, being isolated and naive, continued to talk online to teens and told them what was happening. They told her it was sexual abuse and he was a pedophile.

She began questioning if it was her fault. Did she dress wrong or say something wrong? Ellie started wearing baggy clothes and binding herself to stunt her development.

Ellie said she was “grateful” the abuse never went beyond fondling, but the incidents became so “bad” and some moments “terrified” her, so she found the courage to tell her mother when she was 14.

Her mother started crying and became angry at God, not her husband, for “letting this happen,” Ellie said.

Ellie said she knew her mother must have confronted him because a week or so later, her mother asked Ellie to apologize to him and Ellie refused. Her mother told her it was the only way to “bring peace” back to their home.

Eric Gintert told his wife he had asked Ellie not to tell her, so her mother blamed Ellie for betraying his trust. Her father denied it was sexual and her mother believed him.

“That was the moment I realized there was no salvation in my home,” Ellie said.

She said the abuse continued over four or five years and she tried to kill herself twice because of her “mental torment.” She also would scratch herself to draw blood, had a few incidents of cutting and would intentionally burn herself with a curling iron.

Breaking point

On March 17, 2023, when Ellie was 17, she and father had a fight about the family business when he accused her of sloppy work, but she walked away and went to bed.

The next morning, she awoke to her father fondling her, and she pushed him off. Her father then told her he needed to hurt her, like she hurt him.

After breakfast, she was called to her parents’ bedroom and her father began pushing her up against the wall and slammed her against the bed.

“He kept saying I needed to be put in my place and how he would always get the last word — the last punch,” Ellie said.

‘Lifeline’ or bad man

Ellie contacted her friend “Gary,” whom she had met online when she was 16. Gary lived in California. She thought he was about 18 years old. She later learned he was about 16 years older than her, but this was after she became “emotionally attached” to him, though they had never met in person.

She told Gary about the recent molestation and assault by her father. He contacted HHS and reported what had been happening. She realizes now that Gary was likely motivated for his own purposes but he was her “lifeline” at the time.

Ellie also called 911, and several Hiawatha police officers, along with HHS caseworker Greg Wilson, showed up at the house. Officers and Wilson told her it was going to be OK and tried to make her feel safe. When her parents arrived, officers took her dad out of the house to talk with him.

Wilson, who Ellie came to rely on and trust, came up with a safety plan for the family — meaning Ellie and her siblings would stay with their mother in the home and Eric would have to move out and couldn’t have contact with the children until the investigation and HHS case was closed, according to the police reports. Eric Gintert went to stay with his parents.

Ellie was scared to stay because her family was siding with her father, but Wilson said he would check in on her and even gave her a code phrase to send him if she didn’t feel safe.

She hadn’t thought about her father going to jail. She just wanted the abuse to stop, but she had become the enemy — the “monster” in the family, she said.

Police charge Eric Gintert

Eric Gintert was charged with nine charges — two counts of third-degree sexual abuse and indecent contact with a child — fondle or touch; and one count each of incest, assault with intent to commit sexual abuse, indecent contact with a child — over clothing, willful injury resulting in bodily injury and assault — contact insulting or offensive, according to a criminal complaint.

The described incidents occurred from April 20, 2018 through April 19, 2019; as well as June 1, 2022 through Aug. 31, 2022; and March 18, 2023, the complaint stated.

Hiawatha Police Capt. Pat Kremer, who worked on the investigation, said Eric Gintert admitted to fondling Ellie as a form of discipline on March 18, 2023.

According to the police report, Eric Gintert said he was trying to “sober Elisabeth (Ellie) up or to frighten her” because she hurt him. He also admitted to knowing it was wrong. The father said he thought he had done it possibly three times.

During the March 18, 2023 incident, Ellie told police her father also attempted to touch her below the waist but he denied it. He said he was only trying to grab her to pull her closer to him, according to the police report.

Kremer, during the investigation, asked Gintert when he started touching his daughter and he initially said he didn’t know. When Kremer told him Ellie said it was around age 12 or 13, Gintert said he didn’t think she was that young. He thought it started when she was 15 or 16.

“He justified everything as discipline,” Kremer said.

According to the police report, Eric Gintert denied, more than once, his actions were sexual.

Ellie’s mother seemed to be aware of her husband’s inappropriate touching. She told police he told her about touching Ellie’s breast one other time, but she didn’t think it was sexual. Eric made it seem like an “accident.” Later she also told police Eric told her he “intentionally grabbed his daughter’s breast as punishment.”

She blamed Ellie for being rebellious and fighting with her father, according to the police report.

“This was an unusual case because there were so many kids in the home, and we were concerned about possible harm to all of them, but nobody else admitted to any abuse,” Kremer said.

Eric Gintert mentioned to police that he knew Ellie would be “overly dramatic” about telling police what happened, according to the report.

According to the police report, Wilson told Eric that his story is consistent with what Ellie told him and police, so Wilson didn’t think Ellie was being “overly dramatic” with all the other incidents she cited.

Kremer said he believed Ellie. He found her credible and “honest.”

“I found her to be a strong, smart and a kind person,” Kremer said. “She was naive to the outside world. This wasn’t easy for her to go through.”

Birthday escape

On April 21, 2023, about “30 minutes” after Ellie turned 18, she left home. Gary traveled to Hiawatha because she planned to leave with him and go to California.

“Nobody else cared about me,” Ellie said. “Another evil man was the person who saved me.”

She thought it was love but realized much later he had been grooming her.

Ellie said her bags were packed, but her mother wouldn’t let her take anything, so she left with the clothes on her back. She had no phone, identification or money.

Ellie was upset, so Gary suggested they go to an arcade in Cedar Rapids to calm down. Ellie then called Wilson, who was looking for her, and he came to the arcade. They talked, away from Gary, and Wilson advised her not to go with Gary.

The caseworker also gave Ellie information about the GuideLink Center in Iowa City, which could provide mental health counseling, along with referrals for housing and other resources. Ellie listened.

She connected with GuideLink, which gave her immediate shelter and counseling. GuideLink also connected her with an advocate at United Action for Youth, which helped her get a state identification card, a job and food assistance.

After Ellie lived in a shelter for a month, she eventually moved in with Gary in North Liberty. She was working a couple of jobs — more than him.

Ellie said she realized their relationship wasn’t normal after being around people her age, and she broke up with Gary. Her counselors and advocates were “overjoyed” when she made the break, she said.

After the break up, she tried to contact her mother, but her mother refused to talk to her. She tried again to talk with her mom in May 2024, but her mom again refused. They haven’t had contact since.

Sentencing in October

Eric Gintert pleaded guilty in April to five charges — willful injury resulting in bodily injury, a felony; and assault with intent to commit sexual abuse, indecent contact with a child and two counts of indecent contact with a child, all aggravated misdemeanors.

The other four charges — two counts of third-degree sexual abuse, incest and assault with intent to inflict serious injury — were dismissed as part of the plea agreement.

He faced up to 13 years in prison, but was eligible for probation.

Assistant Linn County Attorney Ryan Decker, in recommending Gintert serve 13 years in prison during his October sentencing, noted a “gravely concerning” psychologist’s evaluation regarding Gintert’s attitudes and behavior.

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A court transcript of the sentencing was obtained by The Gazette to review this evaluation, which is usually confidential but Decker recited some of it in open court.

Tracy Thomas, an Ames clinical and forensic psychologist, said in her evaluation that Gintert appeared “excessively vigilant to issues involving sex — being extremely angered at his 17-year-old daughter talking online with a young man.” She said Gintert also believed his daughter somehow encouraged his own inappropriate behavior. He thought it was acceptable and necessary to discipline his child by touching her in this way, she noted.

She said Gintert also had a “hostility toward women and a strong need to be in control of the women in his life. He exhibits a need to establish full dominance over the women in his life,” the report stated.

Decker said Gintert stated he had been going to therapy for years, but Decker noted it didn’t appear rehabilitation had been successful. Decker had concerns Gintert would reoffend inside the home and that it would again be hidden.

Ellie, during her father’s sentencing, read a lengthy victim impact statement, which included most of what she told The Gazette in interviews.

“In my time as an adult, I have experienced a lot, endured a lot and I know I will have my fair share of grief going forward,” Ellie said in her statement. “But what keeps me going at the end of the day is the fact that I escaped you.”

Gintert, during sentencing, apologized for “any pain and suffering” he caused his family and the “hurt I’ve caused my daughter resulting from my anger,” according to the court transcript. He also apologized for hurting his parents, employer, church and Jesus.

He said anger was the cause of his actions or behavior and he had been in therapy for more than two years.

“This situation has been embarrassing and humbling, to say the least,” Gintert said in his statement. “And I wish nothing more than to move forward and continue to be a law-abiding citizen.”

Gintert’s co-workers, some friends and his children and wife wrote letters of support for him that were submitted to the judge, saying he was a good and decent man who would never harm his children. Some mentioned they believed he pleaded to protect his wife because the prosecution “threatened” to charge her.

Decker, during sentencing, said Gintert’s lawyers were told the prosecution considered charging Ellie’s mother but ultimately decided against it.

Sixth Judicial District Judge Jason Besler suspended four of the sentences and placed Gintert on probation for two years. On the charge of assault with intent to commit sex abuse, Besler sentenced him to serve 180 days of that two-year sentence in jail but allowed him to participate in work release.

Besler also ordered him to comply with sex offender registry requirements and serve a 10-year special sentenced of parole because this is a sex conviction.

Ellie, when talking about the sentencing during this interview, started to tear up. She called the sentencing “several minutes of heartbreak.”

She said she reported the abuse to protect her siblings, but she discovered how much she needed it for herself.

“I will never get back my childhood,” she said.

His sentence, she said, was disappointing, but even if the “system” failed her, the people in the system — Wilson, Decker, Kremer, other Hiawatha investigators and Anastasia Basquin, the Linn County Attorney’s Office chief victim liaison — didn’t give up.

“They made a difference to me,” she added.

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Going forward

Ellie’s life today isn’t easy, but she is happy on her own. She struggles financially, but she now has a more stable job and hopes to get back into therapy and eventually go to college.

“I want to heal and build a good foundation for a successful life,” she said. “Success to me looks like a white picket fence with someone who loves me, having kids and a career in social work to give back.”

She has forgiven her father and her family.

“A higher power will deal with him someday, and he will have to live with the guilt. That’s enough,” Ellie said.

Trish Mehaffey covers state and federal courts for The Gazette

Comments: (319) 398-8318; trish.mehaffey@thegazette.com