Grieving is harder in a pandemic, whatever the cause

Over 500,000 Americans have succumbed to COVID-19, but many more Americans have also passed due to other illnesses, accidents, old age, etc. Survivors must follow the coronavirus mitigation guidelines, not comforted in the usual ways. Mourners must suffer a deficit of loving hugs, sharing of tears, reminiscing of past experiences, and few consoling neighbors stopping by. Knowing everyone is thinking of you, praying for you, and sending you strength with cards and texts, but those can't compare to personal connection.

We're left to fend for ourselves and we can do it! Allow yourself to cry, grieve, sleep, exercise, walk outside, learn to meditate, do yoga, call a friend or family member, answer the phone if a friend calls, don't let it go to voice mail! I dread seeing someone for the first time since my son's death and may relive the details, but that is OK too. Grief doesn't suddenly end, if ever, but does get better!

AND, if you can, find a counselor, schedule an appointment! They are difficult to find these days because so many people are struggling with mental health issues. The pandemic has drastically affected drug and alcohol abuse, depression, loneliness and anxiety. Your appointments will be teleconferences, but with video and audio, they help!

My heart goes out to all who have lost a loved one. Remember to take care of yourself. The pandemic will end, but our love will not.

Susan Hartwell

Iowa City