Monkey gland sauce is on tonight's menu in Augusta

AUGUSTA, Ga. -- For an hour Tuesday night, maybe be glad you aren't a former Masters champion.

OK, I'm exaggerating. But the former champs can put their taste buds to the test at the annual Champions' Dinner if they so choose.

The menu is dictated each year by the defending champion, and Charl Schwartzel of South Africa has just one item on his menu that sounds a bit questionable to an American who hasn't done much dining in Johannesburg. That would be the monkey gland sauce accompanying filet mignon, lamb chops, chicken breast and boerewors, a South African sausage.

Glands aren't actually involved, I'm told. Or monkeys, for that matter. You can get the sauce in most South African steakhouses. Monkey gland burgers are found in some South African fast-food restaurants.

Schwartzel sounds like a restaurateur. He'll have an iced seafood display, a sampling of international cheeses and appetizers, and featured specialties like sliced biltong (a cured meat) and droewors (a dry sausage). With dinner comes vegetables that don't seem particularly exotic: Potatoes, sweet corn and green beans.

Zach Johnson's menu here in 2008 was topped by Iowa beef and Florida shrimp. As I recall, nothing named for a monkey or its glands was part of the meal.

Seeing how I've never won a green jacket here, I may be having my Tuesday evening repast at

Five Guys Burgers and Fries, just down the street from Augusta National on Washington Road. I will not be asking for the monkey gland sauce.