Back at My Post

After a week away, I'm back at the corner of Third Avenue and Fifth Street SE. Sifting through e-mail and news I missed. Slowly.

In the interest of re-remembering how to type and make English sentences, here's what I did on my summer vacation.

Our family vacation was fun, if not very restful. My wife, kids and I spent four days last week on Mackinac Island, Mich.

We have the T-shirts and credit card statements to prove it. 

Motorized vehicles are not allowed on the island, with a few exceptions. It's all horse and pedal-power. And no, all that oil gurgling into the Gulf had no bearing on our trip planning. We're not that organized/thoughtful/responsible.

Although I will say riding in horse-drawn taxis and then watching TV spill-cam images can make for an interesting high-speed course in American transportation history. I can report that sweeping up horse deposits on the street is much easier than scrubbing oil tar from a bayou.

Of course, it took plenty of British Petroleum to get us there and back. We will not be picking up a Golden Gore award anytime soon.

But I'm hoping that my daughters, at least, learned a little about patience. You can't be in a big hurry when you're

your source of transportation has to stop occasionally to rest and get a drink.

That's probably wishful thinking. Now back to iCarly.

And I'm afraid they're too young to understand the island's historic lessons on the military importance of elevation and intelligence.

In July 1812, 300 British Redcoats and Native American allies landed on the north end of the island and promptly marched to the island's highest point. That point overlooked the American-garrisoned fort on the south end of the island, which was built, originally by the French, to protect the village and port.

The British fired a single cannon warning shot over the fort. The U.S. commander, with just 67 soldiers on hand, did some quick arithmetic and analysis of his precarious position and surrendered. Word had not yet reached the fort that there was a war on. Surprise.

In 1814, American troops landed on the north end and tried to retake the island. But by then, the crafty Brits had built a fort on the island's highest point to protect against a northern landing. Brits 2, U.S. nil.

The treaty that ended the war gave the island back. And Mackinac is now firmly in American hands. Hands stained with fudge, which you can buy in massive quantities everywhere.

And, thank goodness, the British can no longer threaten our shores. Uh...

Anyway, if you ever go to Mackinac, please don't skip taking a bike ride on the state highway that runs all the way around the island. It's a beautiful, easy ride and was the best part of the trip. And it gets you out of the crowded, tourist-filled downtown.

You can stop at the very spot where the Brits landed. There's a restaurant there where you can order a couple of  hamburgers, chicken strips and a hot dog for...$40. Surprise. As I surrendered the contents of my wallet, I got some sense how that American commander felt.