Pants-Free Parenting: Costs of the perfect summer add up

Now that the summer is over, I can reflect with nostalgia on how little I earned over the past three months. Writing for the newspaper isn't my only job. I make a living as a freelance writer. I write essays and articles for various sites on the Internet. At times, I've worked as an editor and a social media consultant. But for the past five years, I've been working as a freelancer - I have to pay small business taxes and keep track of my billing in a spreadsheet, where I can chart the ebb and flow of my income.

And for the past five years it's been the same - low in the summer, peaking in the winter and spring, then dipping back down again. There is a reason for that: Summer costs a lot. Between baby sitters and camps and the lack of time to work, the total cost of the summer adds up.

It is difficult to discuss the economic realities of children. Children (or at least my children) are wonderful. Putting them in a ledger and looking at the stark economic reality of the cost of their lives can seem cruel. But for many parents struggling to give their children the nostalgia of summer, while still being able to afford to eat, the burden is a pressing reality.

I should clarify that I am extremely lucky. I work because I want to work. I'd work more if I could afford to. My husband has good, steady employment. I have flexibility, we own our home, we were able to afford a fabulous baby sitter to come one day a week this summer, and we have health care. But even with those things going for us, the summer still finds me working until 1 or 2 in the morning and then exhaustedly hauling my kids to the pool (at $5 or more a person) for a 'fun” summer day. I find myself waffling between loving the long, lazy days and dreading them, knowing that they lead to even longer nights. If I do get sleep, I have to get work done while letting the children watch hours of 'Dora the Explorer,” which isn't optimal either.

For a single parent, working parents, or parents with less steady income, the realities are much harder. Because there isn't school, day care costs increase. The costs of camps and other activities pile up. Not to mention transportation to and from those activities all layered with a heavy dose of guilt for somehow not being able to give your children a perfect summer.

At the pool over Labor Day, I found myself chatting with another mom, who said, 'I'm glad summer is over, I don't know if I can afford one more day.”

I knew what she meant.

There has never been a time in history when parenting has been easy. But the economic realities of our nation mean that many parents are on the breaking point. Something needs to change in our country - affordable child care, better parental leave, year-round school - the list and options go on, but bootstraps and bread bags aren't going to cut it. To ignore the realities of this situation is to ignore the next generation of Americans.

' Lyz Lenz is a writer, mother of two and hater of pants. Email her at eclenz@gmail.com or find her writing at LyzLenz.com.