Absentee fathers, you need to be dads

By Carl Sefl

We don't need a Father's Day as much as we need a Dad's Day. Or a Dad's Year, actually. Or a lot of Dad's Years.

First of all, here's to all the men out there who are way beyond just being biological fathers. Yes, here's to those legions of men who are truly dads.

You know dads, don't you? Hopefully you are one. And/or had one. Dads are the fathers who are there for their children. Dads are the fathers who are there to read the story at bedtime, toss a ball in the backyard, applaud at the dance recital, and do their best to answer questions, such as “how do fish breathe?”

On these pages one year ago, we let Eastern Iowa know of new outreach services for the thousands of homes in our neighborhoods and region where a mother and young children cope with life. Alone. There are nearly 7,000 households in Cedar Rapids alone with what some call “absentee fathers.” The reasons for this staggering problem are many, and the solutions are not easy.

It's all about the kids, folks. It's about the fact that, as we say, it's relatively easy to become a father. But it takes a commitment and often a lot of help to become a dad.

And our kids need dads if they're going to do well in school, work and their very lives. Dads are key to guiding kids in some important ways, to show warm and sometimes tough love.

It's all about the children. And, as we've said, here's to all those fathers who've worked to become caring, committed dads. In our eyes and, more important, in the eyes of your children, you are heroes. Heroes in the true sense of making a difference. For the children.

For those who are fathers but would like to work through issues or problems because you want to be a dad ... or for those who are going to be new fathers but know that to be a dad sometimes takes some coaching and help ... or for anyone who knows a father who may want to be a dad - just click on www.nowbeadad.com. You'll find services including a confidential e-mail connection and people who can help and just good information.

Happy Father's Day, and on behalf of all of us here to help, now be a dad.

Carl Sefl of Hiawatha has a career in marketing and founded ROI Marketing Services. He and his wife have raised two daughters. He submitted this column on behalf of The Young Parents Network, leaders of the Eastern Iowa Alliance for Fatherhood and Children. Comments: roimarketing@mchsi.com