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Cedar Rapids, Iowa 52401
From the Bureau: Romance scams
Here are the red flags, ways to protect yourself
By Bobby Hansen, - Better Business Bureau
Feb. 2, 2025 5:00 am, Updated: Feb. 3, 2025 10:37 am
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Many people have turned to online dating and social media to find love and meet new people.
These platforms have made it easier to find dates but also have made it easier to be scammed. Con artists create compelling backstories and full-fledged identities, then trick victims into falling for someone who doesn't exist.
Better Business Bureau has witnessed a growth in romance scams. Victims are befriended and tricked into relationships with fraudsters whose sole aim is to get money and/ or credit card information.
With Valentine’s Day around the corner, the BBB encourages those looking for love to be wary of fraudsters.
This form of deception is known as “catfishing.” Sometimes, it is a lonely person hiding behind a fake persona. Often it is the first step in a phishing scheme to steal personal information or a romance scam to trick their prey out of money.
Sometimes victims are conned into moving money (as a “money mule”), potentially a crime.
How the scam works
Most romance scams start with fake profiles created by stealing photos and text. Scammers may claim to be in the military or working overseas to explain why they can’t meet in person.
Over a short period of time, the scammer builds a fake relationship, exchanging romantic messages and talking on the phone or a video chat.
When the relationship seems to be getting serious, the fraudster claims a health issue or family emergency or wants to plan a visit. No matter the story, the request is the same: They need money.
After the money is provided, there will be no more requests. If more funds are refused, the scammer stops communicating altogether.
Spotting the scam
The specifics may change, but here are some basic tips to protect against a variety of romance scams.
- Too good to be true. Scammers offer good-looking photos and tales of financial success. Honestly evaluate the post. If they seem “too perfect,” alarm bells should ring.
- In a hurry to get off the site. Catfishers will try very quickly to move to communicate through emails, texts, WhatsApp, phones or another platform.
- Moving fast. A catfisher will use flattery to convincingly and quickly speak of a future together. They claim to be in love and may say they’ve never felt this way before.
- Talk about trust. Catfishers will start manipulating with talk about trust and its importance. This will often be the first step to asking for money.
- Don’t want to meet. Be wary of someone who always has an excuse to postpone a meeting because they say they are traveling, live internationally or are otherwise occupied.
- Suspect language. Evaluate communications, watching for poor spelling or grammar, overly flowery language or phrases that don’t make sense, all potential red flags.
- Hard luck stories. Before asking for money, the scammer may hint at financial troubles, like heat being cut off or a stolen car, a sick relative, or they may share a sad story from their past.
Protection tips
- Never send money or personal information to someone. Never supply credit card information to book a ticket to visit. Stop contact if asked for your credit card, bank or Social Security numbers.
- Ask specific questions about profile details. A scammer may stumble over remembering details or making a story fit.
- Do your research. Scammers steal photos so do a reverse image lookup, using a website like images.google.com. Search online for a profile name, email or phone number to see what adds up and what doesn’t.
Bobby Hansen is regional director for the Better Business Bureau Cedar Rapids office. Comments: (319) 365-1190; info@dm.bbb.org
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