Finding meaning in memories: documenting your life legacy

This story first appeared in the December 2024 issue of Prestige, a special section dedicated to telling the stories of Iowans over the age of 55.

Each individual has life experiences that change the way they see the world.

“We have the choice to bury or share these experiences. Sharing your experiences could change your life, opening you up to new people, new ideas, new views. Each life is important, no one more than the other,” said Sandy Bruns, 79, of Cedar Rapids.

As life progresses, hard times may leave seniors feeling isolated or struggling to make sense of their unique experiences. Sharing stories, experiences and opinions can improve emotional, mental and physical well-being. Legacy life stories are a way for seniors to do just that — reap the benefits of reflection — and Bruns is here to help.

After working at St. Luke’s for 35 years, Bruns has been helping seniors tell their stories since the flood of 2008. Like many Cedar Rapids residents, the flood left her employer, Aging Services, with very little. Water was past the second floor, taking documentation, clients and a way to reach other with it, Bruns said.

Many clients left Cedar Rapids or moved in with family. Thankfully, Bruns recalled reports of zero flood fatalities.

“They said, you know, after that flood nobody died, and that was a good thing, but mentally, people did. Especially older people, they lost a lot. It affected them, and I think (a part of) them did die as a result of that flood.”

People were fragile. Seniors especially needed help. Bruns left Aging Services and was quickly recruited by the Des Moines group, Aging Network, to work with flood victims. For Bruns, this meant talking through what was happening around them and crafting a story of what got them to where they are — a legacy life story. It was hard to feel an impact with the amount of help needed, but Bruns and her coworkers provided seniors with support that made a difference.

Bruns received another call to help when COVID came to Iowa in 2020. She began working for Iowa’s Department of Human Services (now the Department of Health and Human Services) in conjunction with Nebraska. This time, help was provided from a distance.

New training commenced for collecting information from seniors online. When a senior expressed interest in creating a legacy outline, families were contacted to let them know their family member was participating. Ethics were important, and confidentiality was critical. Online and over the phone, Bruns would start the conversation.

The process starts by filling out an outline of basic personal information: your name, nicknames, family information, sibling birth order, hometown and your childhood interests.

“We might not have all of the information in our life stories, but this gives us a way to get started thinking back,” Bruns said.

The topics continue through one's lifespan, focusing on significant people, interests and events to help create a rough timeline. Filling in the blanks usually took more than one phone call. Completed stories end up in a written narrative format. At a time of social isolation, the legacy stories were successful.

Sometimes recalling suppressed memories can bring up hard emotions, but Bruns urges readers to remember that it’s your life story. What is included is up to you.

“I felt they were very good stories. Not only did the story bring them back to better times in their lives, but they also found the strength that helped them get through COVID,” Bruns said.

In Brun’s experience, if a senior became ill or passed away, having a written life legacy story helped those they left behind. Recalling special moments can bring a family together or put a smile on an acquaintance's face. We forget to ask our loved one’s specific dates and details, and this information is not always accessible.

Bruns started working with the Life Enrichment Center (LAC) in Cedar Rapids two years ago. The center is working to combine with Horizons, a family service alliance that provides an array of human services, like transportation, financial and a Meals on Wheels program. The goal is to help more seniors with workshops on legacy stories.

“If you create a legacy life story and don’t discover what your life purpose is, something went wrong.”

To document your life legacy, contact Bruns at sdbruns@msn.com or 319-651-5083.