A ‘pro-God’ gospel according to Trump

The Devil made me read it. He really did. He forced me to read the speech Donald Trump gave to 1,500 evangelical broadcasters. I got a glimpse of hell or, generously, a rehearsal for Comedy Central. Trump spoke nonsense and the audience cheered. Reading the speech made me use the Lord’s name in vain and a couple non-printable others for fear a horse would take offense.

Here’s why. ‘‘I come before you as a friend and an ally and a fellow believer to ask for your help and your support and your prayers for this country. We need your prayers most importantly, and I make you a simple promise: In my first term I fought for Christians harder than any president has ever done before. And I will fight even harder for Christians with four more years in the White House.” (What about Martin Van Buren and William Henry Harrison? There’s another one, but I forget his name. They crossed their fingers when sworn in with their hands on the Bible.)

Trump added, “I’m pro God.” What in God’s name does that mean? Pro-God is a description I have never heard from a truly religious person. Trump’s performance was described in one friendly report: “The casino-owning playboy, who has been accused of paying hush money to a porn star, is wildly popular with the religious right in the United States.”

Trump was about two hours late in arriving and spoke to a wildly cheering crowd for a bit over two hours. Some of the mike jocks wore an adapted version of MAGA hats, “Make America Pray Again.” Some stood on their chairs, maybe as close to heaven as they will ever get. It was a ‘‘full house’’— but only after 200 chairs were removed at the last minute. Of course, Trump spoke of an “overflow crowd.”

He talked about all the people tearing down crosses and that he would put a stop to it. So would the police if it were happening. There’s no market for used crosses and they clutter your garage. No one is taking them down.

Trump went on: “I really believe it’s the biggest thing missing from this country, the biggest thing. We have to bring back our religion. We have to bring back Christianity.”

But for many of the audience, he is on a mission from God: to save America from becoming a modern-day Sodom and Gomorrah. I understand he has done some on-site research.

He pledged, if elected, to ‘‘protect God in the public square.’’ He, as a good Christian must, promised to defend Christian broadcasters and their "pro-God" content from censorship and appoint a task force to fight anti-Christian bias, including from federal prosecutions.

Four more years of Trump? Hey, God, spare us. We don’t need hell on earth. And I think most real Christians put on earth would agree with me. Christians standing on chairs or wearing MAPA won’t be asked.

Norman Sherman of Coralville has worked extensively in politics, including as Vice President Hubert Humphrey’s press secretary, and authored a memoir “From Nowhere to Somewhere.”