Cedar Rapids man testifies he wanted police to kill him

CEDAR RAPIDS — A Cedar Rapids man testified Tuesday he planned to have police kill him July 30, 2022, because he was depressed over a break up with a girlfriend and didn’t have the “courage” to do it himself.

Brandon Lee Nelson, 24, on trial for attempted murder and 12 other charges, said he didn’t remember leading police on a high-speed chase up and down Edgewood Road, until the end when he briefly stopped his car on Glass Road NE and planned to get out but couldn’t and then drove off.

When a police officer activated the squad car lights, Nelson said he remembers stopping, opening the door and “forcing” himself out of the car.

He admitted that wasn’t consistent with what he told Cedar Rapids Police Investigator Sarah Lacina. Lacina testified last week that Nelson told her he didn’t remember anything between going out to the bars drinking and then lying on the ground after being shot.

Nelson said he didn’t know what he should say to Lacina because he didn’t have a lawyer. He was “confused.” On the stand Tuesday, he said he later recalled some of the details about the incident.

The defense called one other witness to testify Tuesday before resting its case. Closing arguments are set for Wednesday morning. The trial started last Tuesday in Linn County District Court.

Nelson is charged with one count of attempted murder; two counts of intimidation with a dangerous weapon; three counts of assault on a peace officer with a dangerous weapon; two counts of interference with official acts while armed with a firearm; and one count each of going armed with intent, persons ineligible to carry dangerous weapons, eluding, reckless driving and driving while barred.

Two officers, Blair Klostermann Cavin and Matt Jenatscheck, testified last Thursday they believed Nelson was going to kill them.

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They testified Nelson got out of his vehicle with a shotgun and pointed it twice at Cavin and then aimed at Jenatscheck, who had pulled his police cruiser up next to Cavin’s squad car.

The officers fired 12 times, hitting Nelson three times. Nelson discharged the shotgun once. The officers weren’t injured.

Nelson: Depression began as a teen

Nelson, during his testimony, said he has depression, which began at age 16 when he was “removed” from high school after fighting with another teen over one of Nelson’s female friends.

His depression has continued and he tried to kill himself five or six times, he said. He was hospitalized one time after crashing his car, going 100 mph when he was 16 years old. Another time he was hospitalized after overdosing on sleeping pills when he was 17 or 18.

Nelson said he’s usually drinking alcohol and listening to sad music when he has those thoughts. Nelson said he was depressed over the break up with his girlfriend in June or July 2022. He said they tried to have a baby and his girlfriend had some miscarriages.

Nelson said he remembered going out drinking July 30 with his friend, Keegan Gordon, who testified last week. They went to three bars where Nelson drank beer and “cherrybomb” shots. Then, they bought a bottle of bourbon and a six pack of hard lemonade and drove around.

At some point, Nelson dropped off Gordon at home and continued to drive Gordon’s Chrysler Sebring to his grandparents’ house, where he was living at the time. He went there to retrieve shotgun shells from his suitcase because he remembered Gordon kept a shotgun in the trunk.

Nelson said he loaded the gun and went to Seminole Valley Park to end his life. He sat there and tried to muster up the “courage” to do it. He then remembered seeing something online about “suicide by cop,” so he decided to go looking for police.

While a portion of the video from the dash camera and body camera of the officers was played in the courtroom Tuesday, Nelson said he told officers he was “sorry” more than once after being shot.

Nelson said when he’s heard in the video saying he “doesn’t want this,” he meant their lifesaving measures as officers applied pressure and bandages to his three gunshot wounds. But he admitted he didn’t remember those moments.

During questioning, Linn County Attorney Nick Maybanks pointed to the details Nelson hadn’t provided to police until his testimony Tuesday.

Maybanks said in the video, when Nelson is on the ground, he can be heard saying he didn’t shoot at officers, but “you said you can’t remember shooting” at officers?

Nelson said he doesn’t.

Maybanks asked whether Nelson was apologizing for shooting at the officers, but Nelson said it's for the “incident in general.”

Maybanks pointed out that Nelson, during the interview, knew police were investigating what happened that night and Nelson agreed.

He then asked Nelson if he doubts the officers’ actions — shooting him — were warranted and Nelson said no.

Maybanks asked if Nelson pointed his gun at Cavin and aimed at Jenatscheck.

Nelson said he pointed it at Cavin’s vehicle and “pointed the gun in the direction” of Jenatscheck.

Psychologist: Nelson drank heavily for years

Tricia Aiken, a forensic psychologist who has a practice in Shakopee, Minn., said she evaluated Nelson for more than an hour earlier this year, reviewing his medical and mental health history, police reports and the accusations against him in this case.

One of his mental health records from Sept. 21, 2021 was consistent with what Nelson had told her. He was suffering from depression and drinking alcohol made his depression worse.

Aiken diagnosed him with major depressive disorder and severe alcohol use disorder.

Nelson told her he drank heavily for years on a daily basis. He would get up shaking and needed a shot to stop. He would take shots throughout the day at work and continue drinking at night.

Aiken said Nelson told her he tried to kill himself about seven times last year. He told her about overdosing on medications, cutting himself and driving at high rates of speed on gravel roads.

Aiken said she wasn’t an expert on “suicide by cop” but it was her opinion that Nelson wanted the police to kill him last year.

On cross, Maybanks asked if depression might cause “desperation,” even if ending one’s life may mean harming others.

Aiken agreed it could. She also agreed that depression can cause violence and someone might be willing to do “whatever it takes.”

Aiken also agreed that most of the details Nelson gave her were not given to police when Nelson was questioned.

Nelson didn’t tell Aiken he raised the gun twice at Cavin. He said it had been only once. And he never told her that officers yelled at him to drop his weapon.

Aiken wasn’t given the videos of the shooting to review but she said she didn’t need them to provide her opinion.

Maybanks asked if Nelson told Aiken he didn’t have “specific intent” to shoot officers.

Aiken said he didn’t say that.

Maybanks asked if “murder-suicide” could be the same thing as shooting an officer and then someone shooting himself.

Aiken agreed it could.

Comments: (319) 398-8318; trish.mehaffey@thegazette.com