Actor Tom Arnold recounts childhood abuse during protection center tour

As a youth, comedian Tom Arnold pointed a gun toward his neighbor's house.

It was no joke.

For the 7-year-old, threatening the man who sexually abused him for three years - a neighbor entrusted to baby-sit Arnold - was the only way he knew how to cope.

Times have changed, Arnold, 50, commented Thursday as he toured St. Luke's Child Protection Center in Hiawatha.

The center, 1095 N. Center Point Rd., helps determine if child abuse has occurred, develops a plan to protect the child from future abuse and finds appropriate counseling.

Nothing similar was available when he was a boy, said Arnold, who was accompanied by his wife, Ashley Groussman Arnold. The two wed in November, Arnold's fourth marriage.

The actor has been in Iowa this week, resuming his career as a standup comedian.

Just hours before appearing at Penguins Comedy Club in Cedar Rapids, Arnold was somber as he toured the center.

He nodded knowingly as staff described what children brought to the center have experienced.

“There's no prototype pedophile,” Arnold said after the tour. “They're usually trusted. They're usually considered safe.”

Arnold said he didn't even recognize that what his neighbor did to him, beginning at age 4, was sexual abuse.

The man gave him candy afterward and, because his dad didn't allow him to eat candy, Arnold never told his father.

It wasn't until the neighbor told Arnold that he could shoot his father from his house that Arnold decided to retaliate. He and his brother unlocked his father's rifle and ammunition, and Arnold took it to the street.

The neighbor didn't bother him again.

Arnold said he turned to drugs and alcohol as a teenager as a means of escape.

As an adult undergoing rehab, he came to understand what happened to him as a child. He tracked down and confronted his abuser, then a businessman in Des Moines.

Because the statute of limitations had run out, however, authorities said there was nothing he could do. But confronting the man was cathartic.

“I think (for) boys, there's a stigma. There's a stigma for everyone,” Arnold said. “But believe me, you can move on and recover.”