116 3rd St SE
Cedar Rapids, Iowa 52401
Unlike virtually everything else, Hlastradamus treated you well in 2021.
The seer was 31-23 against the spread in his regular-season predictions. If you think you could do better than 57.4 percent over that many picks in something as fickle as college football, you need to retrieve your reality orb in 2022.
The bowls are testy for even a sage like Hlastradamus, but never let it be said the prophet was cautious. He knows things whether they’re the “buy games” of September or the hokey postseason exhibitions of December/January.
Iowa +3 vs. Kentucky
The sage has respect for the Wildcats and how they actually have people in that state paying some attention to college football.
Kentucky moves the ball. OK, not so much when it played Georgia or Mississippi State, two teams with actual defenses. But it has good skill-position players and sturdy blockers.
So yeah, coin-flip game. And in coin-flip games, the prophet likes having the team that’s getting the 3 points instead of giving it.
Clemson -1 vs. Iowa State
Hlastradamus is going to this game, and is quite irked Breece Hall isn’t playing for the Cyclones.
The seer thinks Hall is the best running back the state of Iowa has featured since UNI’s David Johnson, and enjoyed watching Hall play. He understands why Hall is skipping this exhibition and sees great days ahead for the young man in the NFL.
But without Hall, the prophet thinks too big a chunk of the Cyclones’ offense is missing against a Clemson program that knows so well what it’s like to win at this time of year.
This game is a come-down for Clemson after six straight playoff seasons, but it won its last five games after knowing the playoffs were out of reach. Players play.
Tennessee -5 vs. Purdue
No David Bell for Purdue. No George Karlaftis for Purdue. The Music City Bowl is in Tennessee.
Hlastradamus says if you need more data than that, you aren’t doing this right.
Oklahoma -4.5 vs. Oregon
In an Alamo Bowl of two interim coaches, take the one that is Bob Stoops and has Oklahoma’s talent.
Michigan +7.5 vs. Georgia
The Wolverines are the opposite of soft. After getting punctured by Alabama, Georgia may not be ready for more hard.
Hlastradamus isn’t ready to go all money line on the Wolverines, but the 7.5 points is a nice cushion.
Alabama -13.5 vs. Cincinnati
1. It’s Alabama.
2. It’s Cincinnati.
Bless the Bearcats’ hearts. Hlastradamus — and you’ll never hear him say this again — hopes he’s wrong. He hopes Cincinnati stuns one and all and leaves the Crimson Tide in a pool of confusion and confoundment.
As Hlastradamus’ Uncle Ed told him 500 or 600 years ago, the race doesn’t always to the swiftest, nor the battle to the strongest. But that’s the way to bet.